[Nigeria] Presidential Automated Answering & Information System (PAAIS)

You are welcome to the Nigerian Presidential Automated Answering & Information System (N-PAAIS). This system was designed in Nigeria, by Nigerians, to enable citizens stay abreast of the activities of the President and First Lady; and to project the greatness of the giant of Africa.

To listen to past, present and future condolence messages from President Jonathan, press #1

To listen to past, present and future promises about power generation, press #2, followed by the number of megawatts you’d like to be assured about, and the # key.

To listen to the First Lady’s domestic travel itinerary, press #3

To listen to Jacob Zuma begging Nigeria for mercy, press #4

To disown the Action Congress of Nigeria, press #5

To listen to this menu in Ijaw, press #6

 

To thank the President for his 2012 New Year’s Day gift, hang up and visit his Facebook page. Please note that all messages on this page are monitored, and you may receive an acknowledgment of receipt from the State Insecurity Service

4 thoughts on “[Nigeria] Presidential Automated Answering & Information System (PAAIS)

  1. Hahaha. so very accurate. The promises on power generation always annoy me. I’ve been hearing this since I was a kid.

  2. Lol…you forgot to add, “to listen to the president disown his National ‘shitty’ Security Adviser and other Beer Parlour gossips, ‘Pless’ #419”

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